Sunday, March 15, 2015

A New Life : Pressing the "Reset" Button

Like all girls in their early twenties, one is filled with enthusiasm about their future and also about achieving all the dreams that one virtually lived throughout her childhood and teen. Unfortunately not always does one get a chance to go on a voyage of their own. I'd been married very early in my life, as my mom laid on her death bed, she made sure I was settled and married to a guy who would in her absence take care of me. I couldn't go against her as tears rolled down her eyes. Even though I wasn't really into marrying so early in my life, I agreed to her and took this event in a positive note.

With all the function and festivities of the typical marriage over, I was settling into my new home with a person I barely knew and a family that was going to be with me for the rest of my life. I thought to myself, 'well since it is happening, why not make these people my own and work towards a happy future for me and my husband'. I made sure I keep everyone happy, I made them the center of my universe and did stuff that would keep the family close together. But fate had something different planned for me.

As days passed, a harsh reality knocked at my door. Every night after getting drunk with his friends in the local pub, my husband would get in the room and beat me on small issues. I kept quite for a week thinking he will realize it once he sees me cry, but it was all a waste. His true nature had taken over him. I thought my in laws would support me in this situation, but to my surprise I realized that they were the ones who were adding fuel to the fire each day. My mother-in-law would tell my husband false stories about how I treated them badly and he would lose it. I felt hopeless. I didn't have any place to go. And in all of this, I got pregnant.

I thought God has given me this blessing in disguise. The child will probably make my husband come closer to me and make him understand the truth. A year passed, the bruises and pain of his blows all vanished when I held my baby girl's hand the first time. I saw the younger me in my girl. How I wished everything went back to normal, that my daughter's face would melt my husband's heart, stop his drinking habits. But as a dog's tail can never be straightened, he never changed. The story kept repeating itself.

I had to do something, I couldn't raise my girl in such an environment and each passing day the torture was getting beyond control. One day I decided that enough was enough. Even though I had no one to fall back too, I couldn't take this oppression any longer. I packed my bags and left that house once and for all. It wasn't an easy decision, I didn't know how I would feed my daughter, where I will find a safe place for her to sleep at night or how I will shape the future of my girl.

I sold out all my jewelry and took a small flat on rent. The next thing I did was apply for a clerk in banks. Luckily my B.Comm degree saved me and I landed up a job quite sooner than I thought. From there on I've come a long way today where my daughter is finishing her engineering from a top college in India. God always showed me the path but it took a lot of courage to press the 'Reset' button in life by leaving my in laws. Had I not done that, I don't even know if I would've been able to write this story of mine.

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1 comment:

  1. Blogging is that the new poetry. I notice it terrific and wonderful in some ways.

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